I'm trying to share everyone's joy at them being able to attend Winter Music Conference, Trance Energy & ASOT 450 over the next few weeks...but to be honest, I'm finding it hard to control the tears every time it's brought up. I'm genuinely happy that everyone's going to be at these events...but I was supposed to be there too, right? I shouldn't be bitter, I know...but really, I am a little.
I must've grossly wronged someone for this to happen to me again. I can't explain it. There doesn't seem to be any logical reason for things to turn out this way right now. I suppose the only way out is to accept it and try and find some way to turn this sad energy into something productive. If you have any ideas, please feel free to help me. Seriously.
And for god's sake please don't tell me it's not a big deal/that serious...yes, I know there are bigger problems in this world....and yes I know TE & ASOT aren't going anywhere...but if you really don't understand how much March 23rd - April 11th 2010 meant to me, I'd rather we didn't speak about it at all.
I just want this karma shit to quit now. Please stop taking my dreams away from me. Please stop punishing me. Please, life, forgive me for whatever I did :(
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