Yes, here it goes again. Another blog. For those of you keeping count, this would be attempt number 3. Gawd it's genuinely shocking how incapable I am of fulfilling commitments. Not using this as an excuse**, but every single one of those dumb tests and future-interpreters says the following three things about me: I will fight till the death for an idea that I believe in (ok, flattering), I am incredibly stubborn (am not!!! *throws fit*), and, most relevant in this context, I can never finish what I've started.
I know I've always revealed symptoms of being a wow-this-was-interesting-5-minutes-ago-but-i-don't-really-care-anymore jerk. For instance, in KG. I would routinely beat up the boys who always managed to steal the swings within the first 30 seconds of breaktime being declared. But after drop-kicking Kevin (who I'm pretty sure I also had a massive crush on) to the ground, instead of triumphantly jumping on the swing, kicking up some major playground dust and soaring high above the other kids with my panties in full bloom, I would instead turn to the big yellow plastic slopey thingamajig 30 feet away, and hurtle towards it squealing "oooooh sliiiiide". Then there's the embarrassing example of the 5 kinds of cereal boxes that always adorn the top of our fridge, each with exactly 2 weeks' worth of goodies gone (although in my defense, to this day I can still polish off an entire box of Frosties in one sitting…they're Grrreat!). And of course the more contemporary telltale sign: the fact that i cannot invest more than a few weeks or months, respectively, on the men and careers I am supposedly interested in.
OK so I've been in denial all this time. But now that I have admitted to my paralysing character flaw, surely it shouldn't be too hard to remedy right? Believe me, it is. How many times have i sat in front of a computer screen telling myself that I wouldn't budge until I finished a blog post...only to watch the exasperated machine painfully emit a high pitched beeeeeeep 3.5hrs later and inform me with a not-too-subtle veneer of judgment that it was going into "sleep mode". Evidently, to save some of its battery life and preserve what was left of my self-respect. Even this post has taken me three attempts and 5 coffee breaks to complete. I really have all the makings of a West Bengal government office clerk. Ah now that's a career I should pursue. [Grabs moleskin and jots down latest career-related epiphany]
*Sigh* Anyway, the chronic optimist, I keep telling myself that this time will be different. Please don't hate me if it doesn't quite work out that way because, believe me, I will be doing enough self-loathing for all of us.
So, once again, welcome to my blog! If this is your first time reading a blog authored by yours truly, I warn you I am equal parts psychotic and senti. If this is your second or third time, I applaud your patience…I will be informing the Pope of your potential candidacy as modern-day saints. Yeah Benny and I are tight like that.
Wish me good luck guys. This time I've vowed to be a finis…ooh, slide!!
**I'm not a believer of things like horoscopes or personality tests. I don't think you can effectively place people in air-tight boxes based on arbitrary things like birth date, or their whimsical answers to a few multiple choice questions or traits such as their nose length (I'm sure such a thing exists). Just sayin'.
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